The word "handicapped" debated

Some colleagues and I recently had a debate about whether the word handicapped is offensive or not. They asked me whether I was offended. I replied that there are usually two opposing sides, one strongly against it and the other indifferent. I am more for the latter.  I think we should go a little old school and remember the adage “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” People can say many unkind things, but if we give power to the word, are we are proliferating its strength? In a utopian society, there would be no classifying, no hierarchy, no segregation, and no inequality. But, let’s face it we are not one.

Where does this word handicapped come from? It isn’t used negatively in golf or horse racing. So, is this a word from the sports genre? I did a little digging. As I suspected, this word had nothing to do with disability or impairment at all. This word goes back to the 1600s. It is a name of a lottery game. As a living language does, this word morphed from hand-in-cap to hand i’cap and finally handicap. Even after the lottery game was lost; it was used to level out the playing field in horse racing by making the stronger horse bear more weight. So, it means to equal out the contest. This sounds pretty positive to me, making things equitable. We attach meanings throughout history to words and often focus on the negative way they are being used without thought to their origin. This is something I think the new generation is really missing out on by using the abbreviated, text version, advertising’s word creation, and just plain un-interest in the English language. They are missing out on the richness of meaning.

Anyway, I digress. Let us go back to the debate. I told them, I have had people say things to me using seemingly innocuous words that were offensive just because of the intent in which they used them. I had a woman call me “dear” and not the rest of my group or the people she served later. I felt like I was being patted on the head and about 2 years old. It isn’t always the word itself, but the intent of how it is used that offends. I am not easily offended, but let’s face it some people are offended no matter what.

You can scour the internet and find people giving their opinion on the word handicapped. Some are so fanatical it offends me (this time it does) that they are speakinng for ALL the disabled community. So, let me be clear. This blog post is my opinion and I don’t speak for anyone but myself. If I started speaking for everyone, I would be doing what society often does and lump everyone in one category without regard for diversity.

Shopping at Southcenter Mall: help or no help- that decides the sales

About a month ago I went to Southcenter mall to use up a gift card. I scoped out the stores ahead of time, so I would not have to walk in circles. I zeroed in on 3 stores. I hoped they would (a) have what I was  looking for and (b) I would  actually get some help. Often in clothing stores, the items are hanging too high or are packed tightly together on the rack. Both of these scenarios make me resist buying anything as I can not take a good look at them. A salesperson is necessary if I am going to shop in the store. What`s the big deal? you may ask. If you are asking and you want some insight into my shopping day, next time you go out to a store, bungee cord your arms around your sides and try to go clothes shopping. I would be interested to hear your experience.

 The first store was La Vie en Rose- I needed a bath robe. Well, I was not in the store more than a few seconds when one of the sales people approached me. She asked if I needed help and we started a dialogue about what I was looking for. Not to bore you, but this young woman was considerate, helpful and talked to me directly. I ended up buying much more than intended, probably due to the fact that she was so helpful.

If some of you reading this shrug and wonder why this would be something I have to relate to you, then you may be shocked to know that on a previous expedition to the same mall looking for clothing I only was approached in one store out of 15 I tried. You would not be surprised; however, that is the only store I  bought clothing.

The second notable store was Aldo where the sales woman spoke to me as I entered. She noticed me looking at a shoe and automatically asked if I would like to try it and what I was looking for today.  She assisted me in trying on the shoes and help getting up and down.

I never did make it to the third store since I had found what I needed. I am a very vocal person, so I do ask for help, but I refuse to grovel for attention when it the sales person`s job to sell. They know the product, so should showcase it.

This is a bit of a pet peeve for me as I was once in retail and everyone is a potential customer not just a select visual demographic.
For all you customer service people, recognition and simple respect may go a long way in increasing your sales regardless of the layout of your store.

Welcome to my new blog

Have you ever rolled into a store and were ignored even though you tried desperately to get a salesperson`s attention?
Have you ever had a great time at a restaurant even though it was not 100% accessible?
I have had both experiences and will be writing my experiences and solutions for every day situations like this.

I aspire to create a blog that is informative and enlightening about physical space accessibility and also the emotional intelligence of running a business that will bring in people with disability.

Please join me- all of you. This site is meant to give insight to  those very familiar with disability and those that are afraid, unfamiliar or apathetic about disability.